I need to talk to a gay person
How Do I Help My Gay Friend?
by D’Ann Davis
“How do I help my gay friend?” This is a question we perceive constantly in the Living Hope office, when out speaking at events, or from friends and church members from around the world. Twenty years ago few Christians asked this question, for few knew any same gender attracted people, or if they did know them, they were ignorant to their friend’s struggles. Today almost everyone knows of someone who identifies as homosexual or deals with a measure of same gender attractions. Even if a Christian finds himself in a season of animation where he does not personally know of a same gender attracted (SGA) person in his sphere of influence, this ask is of utmost importance in light of the change of our society and the growing willingness of Christians dealing with SGA to openly converse about their issues. So how does one assist a gay-identified friend or SGA friend?
The first response I typically give to this question is actually another question. “Does your friend know Jesus?” This is a vital first question any believer must tackle before attempting to help a friend deal with her sexual attractions. This is because there are two different ro
Interacting With a Gay-Identified Friend
The simple retort is that you relate to a gay-identified individual as you would relate to anybody else. Every person is a human creature and deserves to be treated as such, regardless of his or her lifestyle or creed system. Every person you meet is your neighbor, and Jesus commands you to love your neighbor as yourself.
But you already knew this. What you want to grasp now is how to talk with the person in question as the relationship progresses and differences of view on topics such as sexuality and sexual morality change into an issue. It’s at this signal that his or her identification as Christian or non-Christian becomes critical. Your conversations with this friend or family member will gaze very different depending on whether you do or perform not claim the same faith and whether you each view the Bible as authoritative.
Let’s initiate with the non-believer. Since you and this person are coming together from very different backgrounds and worldviews, you’ll need to construct a conscious endeavor to set your philosophical, theological, and moral assumptions aside at the first stage. Think in terms of something bigger than mer
Mental health support if you're lesbian, gay, bisexual or transitioned (LGBTQ+)
Mental health problems such as depression or self-harm can affect any of us, but they're more common among people who are lesbian, gay, double attraction and trans (LGBTQ+).
This may be linked to LGBTQ+ people's exposure of discrimination, homophobia or transphobia, bullying, social isolation, or rejection because of their sexuality.
Other things, such as their age, religion, where they live, and their ethnicity can add extra complications to an already difficult situation.
How talking therapy can help
It might not be easy, but getting help with issues you're struggling to deal with on your own is one of the most significant things you can do.
Talking with a therapist who's trained to work with LGBTQ+ people may help with issues such as:
- difficulty accepting your sexual orientation
- coping with other people's reactions to your sexuality
- feeling your body does not reflect your true gender (gender dysphoria)
- transitioning
- low self-esteem
- self-harm
- suicidal thoughts
- depression
- coping with bullying and discrimination
- anger, isolation or rejection from family, friends or your co
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